News From the Sceptered Isle.
Posted by Paul Woodhouse at January 25th, 2005
I must be sick, perverted, or downright stupid, but I have to confess that I’m actually missing going into Butler Sheet Metal and being locked in the electricity cupboard until my fingers lack the necessary dexterity to type due to said cupboard’s innate chilliness.
At least I could get myself warm by popping outside for a couple of minutes. Over here it’s one Alberta Clipper after another with a spot of lake effect snow thrown in for good measure. It’s also way too cold to even pop down to the shops. And when I say cold, I mean you can’t go outside without any underwear on cold. You’d be right for admonishing an Englishman for moaning about the weather, but Britain wouldn’t know a spot of extreme weather if a tornado came up and twirled around like a centrifugally-challenged Tonya Harding.
Anyway, that stir crazy, lame intro is only a little precursor to what’s currently going on over in Blightly. I’ve just received the latest update email from Butler Sheetmetal HQ. John’s actually starting to put sentences together. Either that, or he’s getting my sister to ghost write them for him. If that’s the case then she’s as dumb as he is.
John told me that one of our customers was telling him how they really love this blog and has been ‘cocking’ himself on a regular basis (email me for a definition). So, whilst he was giddying like a kipper, John plopped an extra 50 pounds sterling onto his bill. Without naming names, consider yourself warned, Steve!
John also tells me about Tom the Nigerian wanting to place an order on a daily basis. He’s under the illusion that we’re about to make a fortune out of this chap. Maybe a crash course in Nigerian spam techniques is due when I get back. As it stands, I shudder to think what John’ll do if he ever gets wind of Jimmy Akinbiyi who’s got oesophogal cancer and is about to keel over at any second, but needs to find a home for $36 million.
They’re also in the middle of making 45 stainless steel bins for a crematorium in Iraq, are quite hopeful for one or two of the larger planter enquiries and being asked to source manufacturers for some home decorative items that we already provide parts for - I know that last one’s vague, but I’m hoping to get permission to do a larger piece on them once I get back.
There’s quite alot of other bits and bobs going on that I can’t mention, but it seems that the boys are rushed off their feet for the next couple of months. Plus Jasper is about to have six weeks off to have his groins fettled (double hernia, not upper thigh massage). Get well soon, Jasper.
I might not be the only one looking forward to me getting back in the next couple of weeks.
I too was the victim of Hernia 5 years back and I know how does it pain. Good luck Jasper. Just be pationate while you go through the surgery.